What I need to work on

Front Cover

• "Electriff Have Returned" needs to be in middle of page
• Fill the white empty spaces
• Add price under title
• Make main photo seem more real, not cut out
• Add QR code

Double Page Spread

• Don't colour in eyes
• Change image to other design shown in drawings [Click Here]
• More red needed for consistant colour scheme
• Make picture overlap title
• Text needs to be in columns
• More interesting font
• Reference author

Contents

• More brief sentences
• More content - "Gig Guide/Reviews/Latest/News ETC"
• Needs to show magazine has at least 80 pages
• More branding
• Heading must say "contents"
• Sectioned better; columns as well as rows
• Image of crowd needs to be more exiting
• Make image of guitar + plectrum more interesting

Overall Magazine

• Variety of shot distances
• More content/objects/setting
• Include page numbers, date
• Mise-en-Scene needs much more thought
• Consistand heading typography
• Logo present on every page
• Look at Q magazine

Teacher Feedback - Mr Nicolle

Teacher Feedback - Mr Smith

Magazine title: BREAKDOWN – Luke Niblett

	Minimal  Level 1 10 – 23 marks	Basic Level 2 24–35 marks	Proficiency Level 3            36–47 marks	Excellence Level 4            48–60 marks
framing a shot, including and excluding elements as appropriate		Photo’s fine but not sure about DPS image
using a variety of shot distances as appropriate		Variety of distance used but guitar and plectrum don’t add much
shooting material appropriate to the task set		Contents photos are weak, crowd image is odd as the faces seen look incredibly bored. DPS needs different photo
selecting mise-en-scène including colour, figure, lighting, objects and setting		Main image too well lit and seems stuck onto cover
manipulating photographs as appropriate to the context for presentation, including cropping and resizing	Don't colour in eyes, doesn’t add anything
accurately using language and register		Contents is too wordy, DPS article is good if too short
appropriately integrating illustration and text		Everything is legible but very ‘safe’
showing understanding of conventions of layout and page design	No evidence of columns, only THREE things in whole mag, no page no’s, no branding. No grab lines, no fluff etc
showing awareness of the need for variety in fonts and text size	Little to no variety
using ICT appropriately for the task set		Ok

Summary Comment Luke: this doesn’t ‘look’ or feel like a magazine because neither the contents nor the DPS follow any of the conventions. Use columns, use page numbers, use logo/website on page corners for branding. Why is the name of the magazine on the contents page? Why aren’t your contents broken down into categories? Why is you magazine 14 pages long? How much does it cost? Your article MUST be longer. Look at Q magazines and see how they are laid out. You have a lot of work to do (most of it simple basic tweaks) to get this looking like a magazine. You also need to take more photographs.

Peer Feedback

1. Include issue number + price
2. More info of content on cover of various topics
3. More pages on contents page, (Page 30, 31, 32 ETC)
4. Good grammar
5. Interesting context
6. Double page spread needs to be in columns
7. Eye colours aren't realistic

Evaluation of Magazine

Links
Music King http://mrsmithasmedia.blogspot.com/2011/02/musicking.html
The Beat http://mrsmithasmedia.blogspot.com/2012/02/beat.html
PM http://mrsmithasmedia.blogspot.com/2011/02/pm.html
Muse http://mrsmithasmedia.blogspot.com/2011/02/muse.html
PopStream http://lukebodycw12.blogspot.com/2012/02/draft-magazine-cover.html
The Loot http://vishalkumarcw12.blogspot.com/

Double Page Spread Draft 2

Contents Draft 2

Cover Draft 2

Double Page Spread Draft 1

The first design was based on this photograph of Jack White and Meg White from The White Stripes. I like it because it makes the two people seem connected as they have the same skin colour and their hair is sort of merged into each other.

Contents Draft 1

Cover Draft 1

Article Draft

ELECTRIFF are back and louder than ever...

The return of our beloved Electriff has proved that old skool hard rock is still blazing in its glory. The ruthless and unstoppable band have been collaborating on work with artists such as The Kills, Dead Weather and Crystal Castles along with their own work which means that a whole bunch of music is due for release soon. Rumours suggest that Electriff will be touring throughout the UK as well as conquering USA, Australia and the rest of Europe. Cassie Dane and Ben Kurt who have not been seen together for almost 3 years have finally combined once again to recollect their crown in the world of rock music.
The band worked their unbeatable reputation from performing at small venues including towns, pubs, beaches and clubs. They then went on to showering their talent over other audiences such as Wembley Stadium – London, Glastonbury, Royal Variety show. However the Ben Kurt apprised to us that Electriff will also be going back to their roots which mean smaller venues in smaller towns including Lutterworth - Leicestershire which is confirmed. 
During our interview with Electriff discovered that they’re not just all about getting smashed and breaking stuff, they have “been down to hell and back” – Cassie Dane…


BD. What caused you to break up all those years ago?
CD. We were dealing with a massive amount of alcohol and drugs and we didn’t want it to get in the way of our music so we stopped writing.
BD. Did you ever think you’d reunite?
BK. I didn’t even think I’d still be breathing by this date, what is it? February?
BD. Hahaha well we can all safely say you’re still alive and we’re all counting on you guys to return with a blaze
CD. Oh there will be a blaze, oh yeah
BD. We’ve all heard you’ve been working on new songs can you give us a little insight to this? 
CD. We have been writing some new stuff, very heavy. Aha shh you can’t tell anyone
BD. I’ll be sure not too! Ben we heard rumours that you will provide vocals this time round?
BK. Erm yeah I mean I have provided vocals but they’re more sounds than words, I sound more like Hagrid on smack or something
BD. Haha, finally before you leave, who is your favourite artist at the moment?
CD. Well we’ve worked with The Kills and Crystal Castles. I think my favourite artist to work with is The Dead Weather. Erm I have also grown fond of The Strokes…


Electriff, an all time classic rock name of the 2000s are back, and from the reactions of loyal fans that are still showing their support to this awesome rock band. BreakDown magazine were the first in line to confirm this from the band themselves however fans such as the ardent head-banging Electriff fan Bruce Kennedy have managed to find out other through other methods. Bruce, along with over a dozen others have been queuing outside of Cassie and Ben’s hotel for almost a week now just to catch them together. Bruce told Electriff that “It was totally worth it, just to see these two again shows that the s**t which has infected the radios hasn’t infected the rest of music.

Model Profile

Model Names: Dan Hensey/Rachael Dalton Band
Name: Electriff
The band's style is similar to the White Stripes however they are more heavy and their clothing consists of leather and dark clothing which is more similar to The Kills and Crystal Castles. The lead singer and guitarist Cassie Dane (Rachael Dalton) is known for playing electric guitar/base guitar and vocals. Her appearance is similar to Slash; curly hair, nose piercing and top hat however she is also similar to Amy Lee from the band Evanescence. Ben Kurt (Dan Hensey) is very well known for drumming for the band Electriff and also adds a rock and roll image to the band. Ben's look is similar to David Gilmour from Pink Floyd. Electriff product heavy rock music similar to Guns N Roses, AC/DC, Kiss, Marilyn Manson ETC.

                 Dan Hensey                                                             Rachael Dalton

Photograph Influences

My photograph will be stylised like this photograph of The White Stripes. I will make it like this in terms of one subject being in the foreground and one in the back. Because my theme is reversed gender stereotypes, i will put the female in the foreground and the male in the background. I will use the red, white and black colour scheme and also serious expressions.

In terms of camera angles, I will base my photograph around this one; the camera angle is a high angle shot looking down on the subject. Although this theoretically portrays the subject as feeble and weak, it does look good with a slightly wide angle lens. This is shown in the picture of slash where it makes the head area look large and the legs look small, as if the whole body is directing towards a certain point. This is also shown in the second picture of The White Stripes where they're holding their umbrellas in the rain and looking into the camera. Although a wide angle lens isn't used in this shot, it does make it look like their bodies are directing towards a certain point and it highlights their expressions very well.